MOM AND DAD

I should give credit to the proud parents who been working overtime to keep these kids fed and safe. I might also mention they scream at me if I spend too much time on my balcony. They don't know how good they have it!

The finished product! 

THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF CABINET PAINTING – PART 2

So once again we return to Lowe’s (I know this store ALMOST as well as Home Depot) to get our paint. Besides the fact that regardless of what we need to get the process still takes at least an hour – we manage to get in and out with no major mishaps.

Happily we return home – new shiny metallic colors in hand – ready to embark upon our redecorating journey.

But first we must sand our pockmarked beauties into conformity thereby creating a fine layer of dust that proceeds to cover every square inch of living space we have – all 987 square inches of it! Then we must putty fill all of the cracks and crevices that display their old age – which I might add all of the sudden makes our kitchen seems huge cause it takes hours to do all of this.

So now – armed with our brushes – we can begin to change their colors. Of course this all begins with primer – TWO very labor intensive coats that seem to keep getting sucked into the moisture starved wood. And by this point our VERY helpful felines have begun to see what they can do to make the process go faster.

You see the problem with condo dwelling is that you don’t have many options for separating your living spaces – or your pets – from the rest of the place. So as Puck and Pixie run in and out of the open and empty cabinets they are actually helping to add their own “bodily offerings” (i.e. fur) to the paint. We will later refer to this process as “texturing” and all of our friends will be impressed by our mad skills.

The other thing I should have mentioned is that it is 94 degrees outside and will be this temperature all weekend. Our “workshop” also referred to as “the balcony” (and occasionally “the dining room”, “the reading room” or “the sun room”) gets the lovely afternoon rays so while exercising our arms (paint on – paint off) we can also work on our tans. (Also adding a lot of realism to the term “blood, sweat and tears” as we do have actual sweat and I believe a few tears mixed into our paint.)

So…minutes, hours and days later or in painter’s terms – seven coats of paint later – we achieve success. Well – er – that’s to say that the cabinets are painted.

Of course the doors are still scattered around our abode, the cats still have paint on their little ears and we have been tracking newspaper print all over our floors – but hey – we have painted cabinets.

Mission complete!

A PANICKY NEW GRAMMA

So, I assume you've been keeping up with (or have been bored to tears by) the birth of our baby birds.

Well the other night we had a terrible storm. Trees blowing, rain flowing and the hanging basket with our fine feathered friends, swinging.

As rivulets of water streamed down our windows I stood with my face pressed and fear in my eyes watching the basket wildly swing. Jon (my loving and supporting SO) gently reminded me that I was being a moron and to get the hell away from the window and make him a turkey pot pie. (OK - kidding about the turkey pot pie.) Nature would take care of itself.

Well, I'm happy to report that the granbabybirds are doing just fine and seemed to have weathered the storm. (No doubt due to my piling up of towels under the nest to break any unfortunate falls.)

I can't wait until they leave for college...

SAY CHEESE!

July 27 - I think this one is beginning to like having his picture taken!

THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF CABINET PAINTING - PART ONE

So there we sat staring at our ugly kitchen cabinets. They seemed to make the rest of the kitchen sad – just sitting there with their dull, pocked brown wooden coats. There was our new kitchen counter looking perky with its fauxed-granite goodness, and our stainless steel appliances looking very industrial and strong, and the shiny metal of the stainless steel sink (deep enough to rinse a dish in!) and goose-necked faucet gleaming to perfection and the brand new brushed nickel track lights that made you think gourmet chef. (Hey – I can boil noodles!)

And those cabinets. Ugh. They have these tarnished brass fixtures that look like they were forged by some crack addicted medieval metal smith. Oh – but not the cool kind of medieval look. No – these are the 70’s revival look that best complimented double-wide mobile homes. (Which begs the question – exactly how mobile is a double- or even triple-wide mobile home? But I digress…)

Very sad these cabinets are. So off to the internet we trekked to find out about cabinet refacing. Very costly. I can get NEW cabinets for that price!

Did I mention that I can touch the entire kitchen from one spot?

Then we trudged to Ikea to pick up a groovy catalog with little kitchen cutouts of how you would like your cabinets to be. I could have a pantry! I could have fun colors with glass doors! I could be a hip suburban kitchen dweller! I don’t have $5,000!

Sigh.

I know! We can paint them!! We can have an entirely new kitchen for only $200!

So – off we trudged to Lowe’s for paint. As we stood in line with our very hip metallic paint chips (hey we only need to clean and primer the cabinets and put on a two coat process – how hard could this be?) I flipped through a kitchen upgrade magazine and approached the paint clerk nursing a full-on case of kitchen envy.

Of course, if we paint the cabinets we have to get new hinges – right. (I mean we can’t use the odd forged brass that accompanied the blindness inducing fixtures – right?) And now we need a “touch-sensor” dimmer switch for our groovy new lights. And a….

Oh yeah – paint. They’re out of our colors. We have to come back next week.

July 25 - STILL GROWING although i think we lost one. I haven't seen five for a few days. I thought he was just hidden but...RIP.

July 24 - STILL SLEEPING- their eyes aren't really open yet.

BABY BIRD BEDTIME

July 22 - These little buggers sleep a LOT!

BABY BIRDS GROWING


July 21 - Still kicking!

SAVE A HORSE

A great site with a wonderful cause! THE ANIMALI FARM

BABY BIRD UPDATE

July 20 - all is well!

BABY BIRDS BORN

Yep - I'm a gramma! We have 5 fuzzheads in the world right now. I'll keep posting pictures of their progress. I'm so proud! They began to hatch yesterday and the rest are out today.

I've gotta go now - I have a preschool interview first thing in the AM - you gotta plan these things early you know!

Do you suppose the school lunch program supplies seed?

CRAZY CAT COLLECTOR

So the more I hear about things like this: Police Want Va. Courts To Block Cat Owner I think to myself - how does this happen?

Do you not notice when you can no longer breathe due to the smell of decomposing bodies and amonia? Do you fail to recognize the fact that you can no longer see your floor? Didn't you at one point run out of catfood?

What the hell is wrong with these people?

THE FUZZHEADS ARE COMING!


This is from July 18 - three fuzzheads so far...

Our Cats: Pixie and Puck in Full Cuddle

ROCK ART ISN'T JUST FOR FREAKS

So, one of my hobbies is collecting rock art. Here are two of my favorite sites:

The Shame of Rock and Roll

Freak Show Art

LOVE ME LOVE MY PET(S)

I love animals – all shapes and sizes – domestic and non – I love animals. Over my lifetime I’m shared my living space with snakes, hamsters (not at the same time), rats, birds, ferrets, dogs, cats, lizards, fish and a multitude of spiders (who have chosen to live with me of their own accord). Outdoors, (because I don’t love animals THAT much) I’ve had horses, chickens and the occasional goat. The only creatures of any kind with a limited lifespan in my presence are centipedes (they move so fast!), cockroaches (who likes them?) and mosquitoes (do I even need a reason?). One would say I have a healthy respect for Mother Nature and all of her living creatures.

I wish everyone did.

You see, the more I know animals, the more I hate people.

I volunteer for an animal rescue/welfare organization. Over the years I have heard a multitude of excuses from both well-educated and slovenly individuals regarding why it is necessary for them to give up their pet, their cherished family member. We’re having a baby (no time or god forbid – they will steal their breath); we’re moving and the new place doesn’t accept pets (I’m too lazy to find one that does); we’re having a financial hardship (but we still have cable!); they smell (because we never clean their litter box); they are mean (because we teased them as a baby); they are bad (because we never disciplined them); they scratch the furniture (because they are animals); we didn’t know we’d actually have to take care of them (because we’re morons).

Animals do not reason. They are animals. You can not explain things to them. You can not tell them, “It’s not you, it’s me” the way you told your 9th grade boyfriend. They are not people (although some of us treat them as if they are).

Pets love their pet parents absolutely. They trust them for food, shelter and love. That’s not to say that just like human children you can’t get a “bad egg” every now and then. But for the most part animals are trusting souls that love you, and will in some cases put themselves in harm’s way to protect you, no matter what.

But in our disposable society of today it seems all too easy for people to just become bored with something and dispose of it. But if you grow bored of last year’s Marc Jacobs bag and want to sell it on eBay that’s one thing, but to just decide that you’re pet doesn’t fit into your life anymore is another. It is a responsibility, a living creature that you decided to bring into your home and care for – for better or for worse.

Your pet has made you smile when you were sad; made you get out and exercise; slept at the foot of your bed when you slept alone; greeted you when you came home and missed you when you left; kept strangers at bay; given you something to do when you were bored; and loved you unconditionally.

Yet people have tossed those trusting souls out of moving car windows; dumped these gentle creatures on the sides of roads; put their sad eyes behind shelter bars or worse under euthanasia glass; held newborns under water until the bubbles have stopped; tied up family friends and shot them; left these loyal pets to starve; given them unsuspectingly to strangers who then sell them for research; left these once loved animals out to fend for themselves because they could no longer, for whatever lame excuse, handle the responsibility anymore.

Are there any acceptable reasons when it is OK to give up a pet? OK – I’ll play – how about death or severe disability (going to an “old folk’s home” counts)? Allergies of catastrophic proportions (and I don’t mean – ooh – my nose is itchy)? Loss of home? Moving to another country (in which you’d be forced to quarantine your pet for an extended time)?

Ah – yep – that’s about it.

NEW BUILDING

So they are building a 16 story high-rise condo about 6 inches from my office building right now. I have a beautiful office on the 11th floor of an office building that I can see the US Capital Building and the National Monument from.

I have a clear view of Clarendon from my huge picture window. This is premium space that we pay top dollar for.

About 4 months ago they broke ground and have since laid the foundation. It's a pretty cool process watching them assemble a crane and pour cement. The construction workers move around like an ant colony doing this and that.

However, the foundation for this new building is 6 inches away from my window (and 11 stories down). Gone will be my beautiful and patriotic view. Gone will be my ability to gauge timeliness of National airport takeoffs and landings. Gone will by my ability to daydream while counting clouds, birds, cars, potholes... No longer will I be able to adjust my underwear while standing in front of my window.

Now, I have to look forward to some naked fat man brushing his teeth 6 inches from my office window. Husbands and wives fighting (or making up). People perusing porn on their computers and baby sitters making out while small children watch cartoons. I believe that this will be VERY distracting from my normal work day.

I believe I may see things that will make me want to gouge my eyes out with a pencil.

But let's examine the reverse. Some moron is going to pay (condos starting in the mid-) $400,000 to watch me update my Blog and adjust my underwear. Boy do I feel bad for them.

At what point did some slightly deranged builder think "hey, we could really SELL this space"? Are people so desperate for living space that they are willing to watch a bunch of people working in an office SIX INCHES AWAY?? Perhaps they enjoy the dull glow of the computer CRTs as they fall asleep each night.

I can't wait.

SALES GIRL IN ACTION

I was in Home Depot today and sold a guy a Dremmel. Keep in mind, I don't work in Home Depot. I just hang out there a lot. And I like power tools.

I'm still waiting for my commission check.

DO-IT-YOURSELF.

It seems they forgot to tell you that Do-it-yourself means not only do you get the luxury of attempting to figure out just how crooked the underpaid and overworked contractor team built your humble abode but you ACTUALLY get the privilege of waiting in line for an underpaid and overworked Home Depot or Lowe's employee to tell you that whatever it is that you need, is out of stock. And due to be delivered...er...someday.

Oh and by-the-way - the color you want is DISCONTINUED in whatever size you need it in so you'll have to cut it by your Do-it-yourself self with tools that we can sell you for more than the cost of a poor immigrant day worker and his entire family.

Case in point: We purchased a lovely 2-bedroom, 1.5 bathroom condo about 3 years ago. OK - lovely if you consider that the woman we bought it from was allergic to the entire outside world so insisted on hermetically sealing herself inside. With rolls and rolls of scotch tape. I mean rolls! Scotch tape held up towel rods in the bathroom, curtain rods in the bedroom and were randomly adorning various spaces through out the entire dwelling.

It smelled like old people (having hermetically sealed themselves...) and the carpet had a funky "slippery" feeling when exposed to a bare foot probably occurring from the low melting point of scotch tape.

Well for three years we have been attempting to bring it up-to-date. (Meaning: run electricity and hot water.) It amazes me what people will pay for a rat trap these days!

Nonetheless, I can honestly say that I know my local Home Depot better than most of the employees. My spouse has gotten to the point where he will just grab a ladder, and perch himself precariously on top trying to dig the item (that of course wasn't on the shelf) out of pile of miscellaneous things stacked about 2700 ft above sea level.

Our last improvement consisted of replacing both of our bathroom vanities, sinks, faucets, medicine cabinets and lights. One of the sinks we need had to be special ordered. (Of course - because nothing in our place is a standard size.)

We went to Lowe's, picked one out and ordered it. Three weeks later got the call to pick it up. We went and waited "oh about 10 minutes" (which translated into normal human terms means 1 hour) for them to bring it up front. When we inspected it there was a huge chunk missing from the bottom of the sink near the drain hole. A very large chunk. (I believe there was a VW Bug parked in it.)

When we brought it to the attention of the employee they said "no problem - the drain will cover it". I'm thinking "Did we say we were installing a manhole cover on the bottom?!"

Nonetheless, we asked them to reorder it. One week later, due to pressuring about the first wait, we received a call that it was in. We went and waited the requisite "10 minutes" for it to be brought up front. Upon inspection, it was a different sink. It had been two-toned and we didn't ask for that. At that point I thought - who cares we need it - and off we went.

It was installed and guess what? The sink drain was drilled crooked so now our drain plug thingie is crooked.

I hate this sink.

NEW EGGS ARE LAID


This is from July 4 - the days the eggs were laid.

I'M GONNA BE A GRANDMA AGAIN! (SORTA)

We have a family of house finches that have returned to our balcony once again to build a nest in my beloved hanging spider plant and raise a family.

Today five eggs were laid.

Once again I will repeat the nervous anticipation of grandmahood as I monitor the nest daily to be sure that the mother is properly nesting, that the temperature is adequate, that the basket isn't swinging in the wind and that the mother has plenty of food.

I can't go through it again! It makes me a nervous wreck! Should I put a pillow underneath in case a hatchling falls out? Should I prevent them from being in direct sunlight? Which is the best temperature? What school will they go to? Should they be raised Greek Orthodox?

Grandmahood is certainly difficult.