Thursday, November 10, 2011

DON’T JUST STAND THERE, DO SOMETHING!

I was at the office discussing the Penn State child abuse scandal with colleagues. Not unlike the rest of the world, everyone was horrified by what happened. But as we started to discuss the story in depth I realized that although it was a horrible story many of them admitted that they’d witnessed incidents (not as horrible, but bad) in which they had done nothing. 

When I started probing why, it was always because of fear of retribution or getting involved with something they didn’t want to get involved in. Mike McQueary, at the time 28-years old and a former football player (read: not a small guy), witnessed a child being sexually abused. Actually saw it with his own two eyes and what did he do? He walked away from the incident and called his dad. Regardless of follow-up (or lack thereof) or intended plans, HE WALKED AWAY AND DID NOT STOP THE ABUSE. Who does that?!?!

It turns out, a lot of people.

Anecdotally over the years we’ve all read about incidents in which people stood around and watched a rape taking place, or domestic violence, or hit and run crimes but didn’t do anything.

Americans are supposed to be these awesome people who stand up for their rights, but apparently we’ve all turned into a bunch of whimpering sissies when it comes to actually stopping something bad from happening.
Where did all of this fear COME from?

Mike McQueary was apparently not too scared of being injured as he played football for years and I would hazard to guess, took a few good hits over time. He’s a big guy. Jerry Sandusky was in his late 50’s at the time and although also a big man, was NAKED in the shower. He did not have a gun (Well at least not in the weaponry sense) or any other weapon for that matter. McQueary could have taken that guy out in an instant and come to the rescue of that child. What the hell was he scared of?? Getting fired?? He would have been a HERO in that child’s eyes, and his parents and the community. You think a firing would be the end of the world?? WTF???

I’m no hero. I’m a 5’7” female with a minor amount of athleticism. I’ve no gun and I’m not trained in martial arts. But I am apparently not scared. I can count down a list of times that I have jumped in to stop something bad from happening:

1) With my friend Jacqui, came to the rescue of two MEN who were being mugged by other MEN.

2) Got into a fist fight with a man who stole my friend Caroline and my handbags. He got away but was arrested shortly afterwards. He was a serial mugger with over 50 crimes under his belt. He went to prison and I was responsible for his arrest and conviction.

3) With my husband stopped two men from carjacking/mugging at knifepoint a woman at the local Target parking lot.

4) By myself in front of a nightclub, inserted myself into a domestic violence situation and helped the woman to safety. (I did not know either of them.)

Those are the ones that pop into my mind. As a child I stopped random small acts of violence between children or between children and animals.

I don’t say this to get any kind of kudos. And there are, thankfully, others like me. But I mention these things to say, if I can do it, why can’t you?

The United States was once a community of doers. That’s why we are the country we are. Brave men and women in the military. Brave citizens who weren’t scared to take a stand. But, I don’t think we are anymore. Everybody runs off to bury their head in a hole.

“I didn’t want to get involved,” they say.

“I was scared they would come after me,” they declare.

“I was always taught to mind my own business,” they state.

“What if…?” they ask.

Well my answer to that is, if you don’t do something, who will? Our country is full of a bunch of simpering sissies and that makes me sad. If Mike McQueary had just DONE SOMETHING to stop that crime, that day this would be a much different story but it isn’t.

What in the hell are you ALL so afraid of??

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG love you DevilKitty! you have very eloquently said exactly what I feel. Luckily I have never seen situations like you have, but I have seen some where I have done what I could to stop it (where the cops were thankful). Just out of curiosity, do you ever submit articles to newspapers, etc.? You should! Gretchen

2:21 PM  
Blogger Sarah said...

THANK YOU! I totally agree. I have never witnessed anything that violent before, but I have definitely rescued many drunk women (friends and strangers) from people who were taking advantage of them.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

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4:36 PM  
Anonymous Kathy Jarmiolowski said...

I have told "mothers" to stop hitting their children. One lady was dragging what appeared to be a 2 yr old. "Hurry up!" she shouted at him then hit it. I told he that if she didn't pick that boy up I would and I'd call the cops. She was so embarrassed that someone confronted her she apologized. "Don't apologize to me. Your baby is a baby not a rag doll." I still wonder whether or not she later took out her embarrassment on that poor baby.

Why is so hard for people to just do the right thing? If something is wrong and I know about it, it IS now my business.

4:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

inspiring article. As to my answer to the last sentence in your blog, I would have to say "YOU!" after reading all of the times you have inserted yourself into violent situations!! :)

6:22 PM  
Anonymous Donna@MummyCentral said...

Treat everyone as you would want to be treated, I say.
If you were being attacked/mugged/abused you'd pray to God for someone to come to your aid.
The thought of my child (or any child) being abused, and people ignoring it, turns my stomach.
My husband was attacked on a bus (we live near Edinburgh, in Scotland) and everyone looked away. Then the driver tried to throw the attacker AND my husband off at the next bus stop. Luckily he refused and insisted on the police being called.
We can't all look after number one in life - but sadly so many people do.

3:54 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

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2:13 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

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2:13 AM  
Blogger Jenna said...

I am only 14. i have made choices that i am not proud of, meaning i have watched others be bullied, and not done anything. this is a really meaningful post to me. thank you so much for opening my eyes to this. i am no longer afraid :)

12:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I was 8 yrs old a large group of boys surrounded me and another little girl and sexually abused us right there on the street. A car turned the corner right in front of us as it was happening and even though I am now 58 I can remember making eye contact with that man yet he kept on driving instead of stopping and trying to rescue us.

5:55 PM  
Blogger Aging Ophelia said...

Good for you, Devilkitty. I've helped numerous people in dangerous situations, too. And helped out people having other kinds of trouble (by the side of the road, etc.), another sort of helping some people avoid. But I know from the times I've been helped myself, that it's not just me & you. Luckily!

Peace, Mari

12:22 PM  
Blogger DevilKitty said...

I'm glad this resonated with so many people. I love the comments and I'm sorry that some of you have had bad experiences to draw upon. I hope everyone is inspired to do more for others. Thank you for reading!

4:29 PM  
Anonymous hamza khanzada said...

i agreed with you devilKitty ..........
hamza khanzada

7:02 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

S i agreed. Thanks for sharing this blog.. inspired..

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3:37 AM  
Anonymous jual mesin las said...

nice info, thanks

4:18 AM  

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